Actually that's a lie. This post has absolutely nothing to do with kangaroos and not an awful lot to do with booze either (though it always helps), but I just fancied a rhyming title. Don't think I've ever indulged in a rhyming title before.
And perhaps the biggest news I have to impart is that time is drifting on and I will find myself, in six days' time, filling one of the many rooms in York St John's accommodation with a selection of the crap that has been accumulating throughout my life. (I went uni shopping on Friday and the spare room is now stacked with assorted bits and pieces that people have decided I need for my new life. I even have a rather fabulous spatula. And who'd have thought there'd be so many different kinds of frying pan?)
I have less than a week left here in my room in the oh-so-familiar, oh-so-endearingly-equally-filled-with-poshness-and-chavs South of England, where I have spent my entire life to date. I've never left it for more than two weeks at a time, I've never left my family for more than eight days, and it's only just dawning on me that it's really happening now. It's time. I'm really leaving. I'll have new people to meet, a new city to explore - I'll be living in a city! You can only truly understand the thrill that gives me if you, like me, have spent your entire life in the middle of bloody nowhere.
You know shit's getting real when you change your location on Facebook.
Seriously though. I'm leaving my family and I'm leaving my friends, and as Becky pointed out on Saturday night when we had a deep conversation in the stimulating comfort of First Great Western's Oxford-bound train, it will be the first time that either she or I have gone somewhere new without knowing anybody, as we've had each other everytime we've changed schools so far. I'll miss having people there who know me, and who are there for me, and who will listen even when things are hard to say. Who'll be there to recognise private jokes when they come up in conversation, or to spend ten minutes laughing so hard we can't breathe, or to reminisce about the past with? And who's going to be there to do five-way-"safe"s with?
I wasn't nervous about going to university until a couple of days ago, but the closer it gets and the more people tell me it'll be the best years of my life, the more terrified I become. There are some things I find really hard to talk about and some times I really don't want to be alone, and the prospect of going somewhere where I will be alone scares me - because at least now I have people around me who know everything about me, and the things that are hard to say aren't so hard when people know. I don't cry often, but I have tears in my eyes now thinking about leaving my friends. I can't help wondering what life will do to us and whether our friendships will survive the next three years and beyond, no matter how hard we try. Life always has a habit of getting in the way, and the thing about old friends is that they've seen you grow up. The past is what makes you who you are, and my friends and I have seen each other become the people we are today. That's irreplaceable. So, Becky, Zoe, Charlotte and Lauren, whatever may happen throughout the next few years, you have been my childhood friends. We have shared so many firsts, discussed so many fears and had so many laughs and nothing will ever replace that. Thank you.
Molly x
P.S. If you want to hear At Last, you can find it here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cHjr0wId-TE
P.P.S The gaps in this post are SO ANNOYING.
Well, since it's ten to four in the morning and I'm still awake, I thought I might as well use the time wisely, so here I am... bed-blogging. I warn you though - though I can't sleep I am exhausted, so this may not make an awful lot of sense.
So, Scotland. It was cold and full of daddy long legs flapping about but I didn't go there for the weather and certainly not the lack of insects: I can't believe I made it back without a midge bite or two. I also made it back without kissing anyone, which is more than can be said for the other places I've jetted off to this summer. But that's another story. I went to Scotland for music purposes and developments have indeed been made! Here goes:
On Saturday I had an absolutely hilarious evening at Hannah's (the girl who plays the guitar) and with the help of two glasses of wine and the hindrance of two very overexcited dogs, we composed a new song! Hannah came up with some new guitar music and then we fit most of the lyrics to it. It's faster and catchier than our first one. Unfortunately we didn't record it this time as Hannah was working when we went to Steve's (the guy with the recording studio), so we'll leave it for next time. It's got a lot of potential though, so we're both excited about it.
We went to Steve's on Monday and At Last is now finished - at last! It certainly has taken its time. We did four recordings of it and then chose the best bits of each one, and then Steve edited it and sent it to us that evening, ready for when Hannah came over and we worked on our new song some more. I really hope that one day we'll get to record it properly, but at the moment I'm still in "Oh my God, I recorded a song! I'm doing another one! An actual live collab like I always wanted!" mode. It's such an amazing experience and I really can't believe I actually got to do it. It's crazy!
I got home from Scotland on Tuesday and on Saturday, my friends and I went out for our 'lastsupper' - a visit to Old Orleans, the restaurant that has marked several celebrations for us, such as the end of exams both last year and this - in fancy dress. Fancy dress, no less, in the theme of various countries' national dress codes. When I was in Fuerteventura last month I acquired a Flamenco outfit, so I wore that. Lauren was Hawaiian, Zoe was French (complete with moustache), and Becky and Charlotte totally ignored the dress code (but still made an effort) by pitching up in Hogwarts uniforms. We made an interesting sight, wandering through Reading dressed like that. It was a brilliant evening though, full of laughs - though we didn't actually get round to the whole goodbye bit, so we're having a last last... er, Starbucks on Thursday for that purpose.
And perhaps the biggest news I have to impart is that time is drifting on and I will find myself, in six days' time, filling one of the many rooms in York St John's accommodation with a selection of the crap that has been accumulating throughout my life. (I went uni shopping on Friday and the spare room is now stacked with assorted bits and pieces that people have decided I need for my new life. I even have a rather fabulous spatula. And who'd have thought there'd be so many different kinds of frying pan?)
I have less than a week left here in my room in the oh-so-familiar, oh-so-endearingly-equally-filled-with-poshness-and-chavs South of England, where I have spent my entire life to date. I've never left it for more than two weeks at a time, I've never left my family for more than eight days, and it's only just dawning on me that it's really happening now. It's time. I'm really leaving. I'll have new people to meet, a new city to explore - I'll be living in a city! You can only truly understand the thrill that gives me if you, like me, have spent your entire life in the middle of bloody nowhere.
You know shit's getting real when you change your location on Facebook.
I wasn't nervous about going to university until a couple of days ago, but the closer it gets and the more people tell me it'll be the best years of my life, the more terrified I become. There are some things I find really hard to talk about and some times I really don't want to be alone, and the prospect of going somewhere where I will be alone scares me - because at least now I have people around me who know everything about me, and the things that are hard to say aren't so hard when people know. I don't cry often, but I have tears in my eyes now thinking about leaving my friends. I can't help wondering what life will do to us and whether our friendships will survive the next three years and beyond, no matter how hard we try. Life always has a habit of getting in the way, and the thing about old friends is that they've seen you grow up. The past is what makes you who you are, and my friends and I have seen each other become the people we are today. That's irreplaceable. So, Becky, Zoe, Charlotte and Lauren, whatever may happen throughout the next few years, you have been my childhood friends. We have shared so many firsts, discussed so many fears and had so many laughs and nothing will ever replace that. Thank you. Molly x
P.S. If you want to hear At Last, you can find it here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cHjr0wId-TE
P.P.S The gaps in this post are SO ANNOYING.
2 comments:
Aw what a sweet an endearing post. Gaps in posts are extremely vexing! The photos are adorable though. It was quite a diary style post and it's so strange how close uni is.
xxx
They are, aren't they? RUDE. Thank you though! <3
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