January 11th: I've got words

I've got words. Everywhere. Inside my brain, floating in the air, decorating the walls... I've got words. They follow me around and they haunt me, and now, sitting here in this darkened room where the only light emanates from my computer screen and the fog creates unseen mystery beyond the glass behind me, I should be able to translate the words that haunt me into letters. I should be able to let them flow from my brain out through my fingers and into my keyboard; I should be able to write a song or a story or a poem. But I'm here instead.

This is where I come when I can't translate my inner words to outer words. When these words I've got won't show themselves, I come here and let my fingers pluck other words from the air and put those down instead. Because I can't do much in this life I'm living, but I can find words.

To see the world through the eyes of a grammar freak is to live a rare existence indeed. One finds themself, at the most basic level, reading everything they see, the words before their face's eyes imprinted on their mind's eye long after the words have disappeared. One muses about the pragmatic and literal meanings of simple declaratives like "good morning" and finds a simple greeting between strangers enough to keep their mind occupied all day. One sees every word they think, type or say dance in their imagination as it passes through their lips or fingers. One repeats a B grade English Language exam three times because they're in search of that elusive A, and risks sounding like a stalker by emailing random language theorists just so they might gain a stronger grasp of that linguist's theory. We all know that to be a grammar freak is to annoy people by correcting them; to have the 'urine extracted' from you (or the piss taken, for those who don't speak Received Pronounciation); and for you to be thought of as highly strange and bit obsessive - but we grammar freaks know that this is what we were meant to do, and when you know, you know, you know? (Yes Becky - that was for you.)

I could say the same for all 'callings'. Take Glee, for example, since the new series returned here last night and Glee fever is heating up the UK with a vengeance - Rachel is patronizing, intimidating and incredibly annoying, but she knows what she's good at and she does whatever it takes to follow where her voice may lead and that is a good trait to have... especially if you can be less of an arse about it than she is. Speaking of arses - Sheldon from the Big Bang Theory. He actually reminds me of myself a little bit, only he's much, MUCH worse. I don't claim to come anywhere near the awesomeness that is Sheldon Cooper. Anyway, I'm getting off track.

I know this is a bit soon to be wrapping up today's post, but I'm currently experiencing a complete evaporation of inspiration, so you'll just have to suck it up. (Sorry, disgusting phrase, but very pleasing to say. Oh, Americanisms.)

Basically, kick some ass. (I'd go all British on you and say kick some arse, but it just doesn't have the same ring to it, so ass it is.) It doesn't matter whose ass you're kicking or the subject at which you are kicking the aforementioned ass; just do it. You'll be awesome, so even if people say you're a freak or call you obsessive or get annoyed with your constant showing off, remember you're following the path in life you've chosen, and therefore nobody but you has the authority to tell you how to walk.

Molly x